


The Confessional

by Alyska



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Coming Out, In Which I Indulge My Inner Romantic, M/M, Marauders, Marauders' Era, Teenagers, Young Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-03
Updated: 2014-02-03
Packaged: 2018-01-11 02:19:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1167467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyska/pseuds/Alyska
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Going on a tip given by a second-year, Remus and Sirius explore a new hidden part of the castle, only to find it won't let them out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Confessional

**Author's Note:**

> This is a commission for [sweetknightmares](http://sweetknightmares.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr, and one I enjoyed writing immensely.
> 
> Many thanks to my lovely beta, [Chrissy](myladyrose.tumblr.com) for dealing with my bombardment of half finished pieces and whining about how nothing sounds right. If it weren't for you, I'd be curled up in a ball on my bed with only four hundred words written.

“Moony, I think it’s this way. Come on!”

“Wouldn’t James have been better suited for this expedition, Padfoot?”

“James is busy. Pretty sure he’s spending the night dogging Lily with hopes she'll finally look his way. And anyways, you’re a Marauder. Exploring’s a part of the title.”

“I’m not arguing that. I _am_ however arguing the validity of your source.”

“Don’t write off the second years just because they’re stuck in the most boring year of their Hogwarts lives. Remember, I found the Endless Bouncing Puffskein room my second year.”

“Finding something, and sticking a male and female puffskein in a room enchanted to have elastic walls and waiting a few months are two very different things Sirius.”

“… Well, I found the enchanted room at least.”

“My point exactly.” Sighing wearily, Remus held his wand a little higher, trying to see further into the gloom of the secret passage Sirius was leading him down. “Where exactly is this mystical observation room again?”

“We should hit it soon. This passage can’t be much longer. Imagine though, Moony—“ Falling back in line with Remus, Sirius looped an arm around his shoulders.” If we find this room we can spy on anyone in the castle anytime, anywhere. We’ll know everyone’s secrets, know the answers to every test. It’s one step above the Map. We could rule the school with this.”

Shrugging his friend’s arm off, Remus shook his head. “Ruling is for lions, Padfoot, not wolves. And people are entitled to their secrets. Take me for example.”

“Come on Moony, you know I wouldn’t hold anything like that against anyone. It’d just be fore one-upping those sneaky Slytherin sna-oof!“

It was as if an invisible brick wall had materialized in front of Sirius, knocking him back onto the floor, a string of expletives left in his place. Ignoring his writhing friend on the ground, Remus stepped closer to the dark, extending a hand out against the seeming nothingness. And yet, in the same exact spot that Sirius had run into, he felt an obstruction; solid, but still undulating underneath his touch, like mist or smoke.

“I think we hit a dead end.” He said, turning back to Sirius.

“Tell that to my bloody nose.” He retorted, taking the hand Remus offered out to him before starting off in the direction they came. “I guess you were right about the second year.”

“I’m surprised you’re admitting to that so soo—“ But another thud and explosion of swearing cut Remus off as Sirius toppled back down for the second time.

“What is… I’m going to rip this thing straight out of the—“ Scrambling to where his wand fell, Sirius brought his wand down violently. “ _Reducto!”_ The spell bounced off the darkness and nearly missed Remus, who grabbed Sirius’ arm before he could cast the spell again.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Giving him a scathing look, Sirius chucked his want to the floor and plopped down next to it. “You figure this out then.”

“Don’t I always?” Remus said back, smiling slightly at his friend, who grumbled and crossed his arms over his chest.

Turning his attention to the obstruction, he placed a hand against it, still amazed at the feeling of the wall. Three paces from where he started, his hand dipped into a curve, bringing him along another wall. Five more and he hit another one, stepping over the still brooding Sirius to walk four paces, then another five, and then one to bring him back where he started.

“So we’re completely blocked in.” He said, mostly to himself, knowing that a frustrated Sirius wasn’t a helpful one. “But we got in, so that means there’s a way to get out…” With a flick of his wrist, he tried to summon something from his trunk, but after a few seconds gave up on it reaching him. “So nothing can get in or out right now… It could just be time sensitive.” Settling down next to Sirius, Remus glanced at him. “I guess we’re going to wait it out for a while, unless you have another idea.”

Sirius shrugged, his eyes focused somewhere else. Biting back a mild irritation at his friend’s moodiness, Remus found himself staring into the blackness as well, wand resting at his side, his hand resting atop it to keep it lit.

The silence was uncomfortable, and the lack of something to look at or keep him occupied only made it worse. Every time Sirius shifted slightly, Remus would jump, the sudden difference in the mundane around him startling. He had been feeling more and more on edge around Sirius when they were alone, and didn’t quite understand why. They had been friends for years, along with James, and they knew each other’s secrets down to every last detail. So why did it feel like there was something unspoken between them?

“Something on your mind, Moony?” Sirius asked suddenly, and a shiver ran down Remus’ spine as he realized he had been staring at Sirius without realizing it.

He wanted to deny it and tell Sirius he was imagining things, but what was the point? They were going to be stuck in this box for who knows how long, so he might as well say something. “I was wondering… There isn’t anything wrong between us, is there Padfoot?”

He almost expects Sirius to laugh at him in his usual way and to pass it off as Remus’ anxiety about friendships failing. But instead he runs a hand through his hair and slumps a little further against the wall. A twinge of fear sparks in Remus’ chest, but he says nothing as Sirius speaks, his words calculated but still unsure. “There isn’t anything _wrong_ between us. But I have been… Keeping something from you and James.”

“You can tell us anything, Padfoot, you know that.”

“I know, I—Look, it’s nothing against you guys but it’s been beat into my head as a kid to keep these things quiet, so it’s hard to say it.”

Nodding, Remus turned slightly, his shoulder resting on the wall as he looked at Sirius. “Well, we’ve got nothing but time on our hands so take the time you need. But you know I won’t hate you, right?”

 “Right.” He responded, albeit somewhat hesitantly. Refusing to look at Remus, his face was screwed up, almost as if he were in pain. It was only when Remus opened his mouth to reassure him that he didn’t have to talk about it now that he spoke. “Don’t laugh at me. And don’t talk until I’m done.” His voice was gruff and Remus nodded intently. “I’m… It’s not like it’s uncommon in pureblood households, and it’s not like I’m not used to being the black sheep; I am a Gryffindor after all.” He said, his lips turned upward without the trace of mirth in the gesture. “But as a pureblood of my standing, it’s expected to be shoved under the rug so that the family line can continue on. And I might as well be a blood traitor. They’re going to kick me out sooner or later anyways. But it’s still burned in my brain to keep quiet about it and I can’t seem to shake that feeling.” Thudding his head against the wall, he glanced at Remus, before returning his eyes to the nonexistent fixed point in front of him. “I’m… It shouldn’t be this complicated to say, but… I like men.” The tension boiled and Remus felt a knob in his throat, unable to speak. But Sirius pressed on anyways, his words now flowing out of him as if he couldn’t get them out fast enough. “It’s not as if I don’t like women. I do, and I think they’re attractive and want to shag them, but I don’t… I don’t want to spend as much time getting to know them. I mean, I don’t mind dragging one into a broom cupboard, but I don’t want to have a relationship with them.”

“But you want to have a relationship with men?” Remus asked, his voice softened and inquisitive.

“Yes.” Sirius said without hesitation.

“Well, as I said before and as you know, I have no qualms with it. You like who you like and there’s nothing wrong with that, Padfoot.”

“You sound like a bloody pamphlet, Moony.” Sirius shot back, and Remus smiled, knowing it was only stress that made Sirius sound like he was truly irritated.

“I’m sorry, would you like me to berate you and send you to the other corner of the box?” He had expected his comment to relieve some of the tension in Sirius’ jaw and shoulders at the least, but instead he looked just as stressed as before. “I’m sorry.” He said, this time with sincerity. “I’ll keep my jokes to myself.” Sirius grunted. “Seriously, Padfoot, I don’t think there’s anything for you to worry about. The elitist families may care about you preference, but you said it yourself; you’re already a black sheep so what is it going to change? And we’re not living in Muggle London, so who else is going to care? It’s not like you’re ostracized by the Wizarding World for something you can’t help.”

Shaking his head, Sirius gave Remus a look; the first look he had given since they had started this conversation. “You’ve got to stop worrying about that, Moony. There will be someone out there who won’t care that you have a date with the moon every month.”

“You can say that all you want, but I don’t have to believe you.” Remus said, turning away slightly. “I haven’t seen any proof to the contrary.”

“I have the proof.”

“Okay, Padfoot, where are you keeping this magical person that doesn’t mind putting their lives in danger to be with—“

But Remus wasn’t able to finish his sentence, because a rough hand had gabbed his chin, pulling him close as Sirius kissed him, firm yet tender. The contact didn’t last long, and when they parted, Sirius’ face looked as if he were waiting for Remus to hit him, though it didn’t reflect in his words.

Opening his mouth a few times wordlessly, he blinked, as if expecting Sirius to fade like a dream. “I… Uhm…” Clearing his throat, he licked his lips subconsciously before saying “I think I might need a little more proof, if you’re offering it…”

Grinning wolfishly, Sirius leaned in again, nipping slightly at Remus’ lower lip. “Let me know when you’ve had enough then.” He said in between kisses, his hand knotting itself in Remus’ hair.

Smiling as well, Remus returned the affection, the bubble in his chest filling with warmth as he let Sirius pull him closer and almost into his lap. Awkwardly, Remus shifted so he was facing Sirius fully, arms bent at an odd angle around Sirius’ neck. His kisses were sloppy, bearing none of the experience that Sirius clearly held, but this only made Sirius smile as he patted the werewolf’s thigh. “It’ll be more comfortable if you straddle me.” He murmured, his other hand cupping gently around Remus’ face, his thumb stroking the other’s cheek lightly.

“I… Uhm… I’m not… Don’t take it as an offense but—“

Smiling, Sirius pecked him on the lips against shut him up. “It’s not a proposition, Moony. I’m not going to push you, it’ll just make the angle less weird.” Remus still didn’t move, so Sirius rested his forehead against the other’s, his eyes sincere. “Trust me, okay?”

Biting his lip slightly, Remus nodded, swinging his leg over to the other side of Sirius’s body.

“Good.” Rewarding him with a lengthier kiss, Sirius’ hands drifted down to rest around Remus’ waist. “And relax. It’s not a potion that’s going to explode if you do it wrong.” Kissing him again he whispered. “Just let it happen.”

He could feel the breath Remus took before kissing him, could feel those thin fingers trail up his spine only to be second-guessed and replaced around his neck, could feel each hesitation before a move of his lips. And with each uncertainty, Sirius couldn’t help but to feel warmer and warmer, knowing that for all his knowledge and intelligence, Remus was bad at one thing. And that made him even more appealing.

It was when Remus had finally decided to move his arms to clutch Sirius’ shirt when it happened. A blinding light emanated from behind them as both toppled out of the box, Sirius banging his head for the third time. Curling in on himself, he let out a noise of rage as Remus blinked above him, his eyes adjusting to the light, and focusing on a blurred, but very amused shape leaning on the wall next to where they had fallen out of.

“Took you guys long enough.” The amused voice of James Potter said as he looked down on them, his face stretched wide in mirth. “If I had bet on it I would’ve lost for sure.”

“You… What?” Remus asked, before realizing his position and scrambling to get off Sirius, who was still clutching the back of his head.

“Come on, Moony. You’re smarter than that. I was sure you were going to catch on.” Pausing James looked between his two friends before adding. “Polyjuice Potion and a bit of second year hair—“

“It was you?” Sirius said, incredulously, his gaze rising to meet James with furious intent as his hand searched for his wand.

Laughing, James stooped to pick it off the ground before Sirius could find it. “’Course it was. Come on Padfoot, you two were fooling yourselves if you thought I’d never find out. You become a _giant dog,_ Sirius. It wasn’t hard to figure out your heart’s true intent there. It was just the how that eluded me for so long. But then I got myself trapped in that very same box and decided, why not? I’m calling it The Confessional, what do you think?”

Sirius looked as if he was going to throttle James with his bare hands, but it was Remus that got the final word. While James was gloating, he had retrieved his wand and trained it on James, his tone flat and dangerous.

“ _Furnunculus._ Come on, Padfoot.”

And with that he dragged Sirius off the floor and stormed off, leaving the third Marauder with a case of pimples that would make a toad turn away in shame, safe in the knowledge that James didn’t know the counter jinx.

But through his rage, he felt the warmth of Sirius’ hand in his own, and his face melted into a smile, knowing that he had a whole new thing to look forward to each day thanks to the meddling stag.

He’d make it up to him somehow.


End file.
